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This Is Yesterday

This Is Yesterday
(Words: Nicky Wire/Richey James; Music: James Dean Bradfield/Sean Moore)

Do not listen to a word I say
Just listen to what I can keep silent
The only way to gain approval
Is by exploiting the very thing that cheapens me

And I stare at the sky
And it leaves me blind
I close my eyes
And this is yesterday

Someone somewhere soon will take care of you
I repent, I'm sorry, everything is falling apart
Houses as ruins and gardens as weeds
Why do anything when you can forget everything

And I stare at the sky
And it leaves me blind
I close my eyes
And this is yesterday

I stare at the sky
And it leaves me blind
I close my eyes
And this is yesterday

© 1994 Sony Music Publishing Ltd.

The Art Of Falling Apart

On February 1, 1995, Richey Edwards of the Manic Street Preachers seemingly vanished off the face of the earth. Six years on, Stuart Bailie looks at the extraordinary life and strange disappearance of rock's most famous missing person.

It is mid-April, 1994. The Manic Street Preachers have almost finished their third album and are in the midst of a photo session on London's Fulham Road. Richey Edwards, who has authored many of the new songs, passes some spare time by filling in a questionnaire for a regional magazine. The second answer concerns the issue of suicide, wanting to know if Richey has given it some thought lately. Apparently not. "Never have," Richey writes. "Self-mutilation is a very differnet issue to suicide. It is a controlled pain personal to you, allowing you to live/exist to some degree."

These are the questions that Richey has routinely answered for the past three years, ever since his habit of self-laceration became public. The interest has been quickened by the recent suicide of Kurt Cobain. Richey watchers also understand that he is mourning the death of his co-manager Philip Hall. The Manics played a charity tribute for him in London in March, bringing Bernard Butler, late of Suede, on for a few songs at the Clapham Grand. What isn't generally known is the fact that a college friend, Nigel, has just taken his own life. Richey's mood is blackened further by the fact that his old dog, Snoopy, is going blind and is losing control of its back legs. Edwards is also depressed by the growing trend of historical revisionism. He even makes a point that Schindler's List is dangerous in its attempts to "humanise" the Holocaust.

I found the following article a couple of years ago and bookmarked the site. I just re-read it and forgot how wonderful it was. Thought I would post it to share with others of like mind. To see the original, go to Leper cult disciples of a stillborn Christ

'Leper cult disciples of a stillborn Christ': Richard Edwards as meaningful in his fans' constructions of their identities
By Francesca Skirvin


In May 1998 the Manchester Metro News carried the following headline: 'Why Did Chris Follow Richey To His Death?' The story concerned a seventeen-year-old from Marple who drowned in the River Severn after making a 'pilgrimage to the scene of the pop stars disappearance'. His mother was quoted as saying 'I feel that it should be publicly known that teenagers are so influenced at this age. Christopher has copied this pop star. He has just done it because he got the idea from him. It is just wrong.' The coroner said 'clearly Christopher was influenced by this media pop idol and undoubtedly he was in a very disturbed state…probably following what he had read about this idol.'

This article affected me in many ways. In addition to my anger at the usual knee-jerk reaction from the press and its seeming inability to consider any other motive for a person to take their life other that the influence of a 'media pop idol' there were more personal reasons. I live in the small village of Marple, I have spent the majority of my teenage life in awe of the same idol and I visited the Severn Bridge a few moths before Christopher 'following what [I] had read about this idol.'

Richard James Edwards (Richey James) was the guitarist, lyricist and 'Minister of Information' (Shutkever,1996:51) for rock band Manic Street Preachers . The band first came to prominence in 1990 and as their lyricist and spokesman, Edwards remained the figurehead of the band until his disappearance in February 1995. Since then the band have continued without him and have achieved huge mainstream popularity.



I can't believe it but after what seems like an eternity, I finally have my dsl connection for my computers. FTPs look out. By the weekend, I am going to have my Manics FTP back up and running plus I plan on starting another one for my Depeche Mode collection which has become fairly extensive - video wise at least. I still need more DM mp3s but I have got time!!!


OK I am finally going to enter something. For the last month I have been suffering from an extrreme case of apathy and I can not seem to shake it either. I think it all started about the same time that I started battling my internet provider...still not resolved so still really bummed out. I am pretty much fit to be tied. I have been patiently waiting about 2 and a half weeks for the place that I work for to set up my high speed account. They even gave me my modem to take home so I was good to go as soon as the phone line was provisioned. I knew that the person that was processing my info was shaky at best and I knew that I should have been more persistent a few weeks ago because today I find out that none of my paperwork has been even processed so I am pretty much still another two and half weeks away from my high speed connection. I am going to go mental... On a lighter note, I have been playing around with some buttons and banners so that I am good to go with my site as soon as I get my connection back....



FTP Banner

Here is the main title that I have been working on for the ftp. I wanted to enter it with the previous entry but for some reason, each time that I tried to enter it, it would not show the picture. It did not matter how I tried to enter it...I don't know what I was doing wrong but hopefully this will show up the way that I want it to...I am continually drawn to the purple and white combo but have been playing around with black and white also...Don't know what colours yet that I plan on going with...

Long Overdue Entry

It has been awhile since I have had a chance to write anything. I have been busy at work learning all sorts of new stuff and it has been pretty hectic in the office for the month of April. I can't belileve that April is almost over. It has just flown on by with barely so much as a blink of an eye.

Work is still pretty nifty. I have been trained fully on this new position that I am in the middle of taking over. I guess by the end of this month, I will be completely trained and able to take on these new responsibilities on my own - pretty cool, I guess. My boss has also approaced me with the offer of taking on a team lead position too. This one won't start for another month or so but I told him that I would most definitely be up for the challenge. What this means is that there would be a group of employees that would answer directly to me. I think that each team lead at this company ususally looks after about 10 to 12 employees. If they have any concerns, requests, suggestions, etc they would go to me. I would ensure that our schedule is adequately covered, that everyone was doing what they were supposed to be doing when they were supposed to be doing it, etc. Kind of like a grown-up babysitter. The people on my team wouldn't only come from the department that I work in either. I guess the thought behind this is that we all then have a chance to see what other people in the company do and then can become really familiar with all aspects and not just the one area that we work in. Makes sense to have as many people cross trained as possible. That way if someone is away, it is a lot easier to find someone to fill their vacancy and work can stay pretty much current without falling too far behind.

Enough about work!!! I am still having a fight with my internet provider so I have completely cancelled my cable and am now just on regular dial-up which really sucks big. I am getting high speed dsl but that won't be for another 8-10 days still. Hopefully it will be worth the wait because I want to get my web site back up and want to start running my ftp again. Combined with the problems that I have been having with my ISP, I have been having a terrible time with one of my computers. It got some sort of virus on it back in March and I have had to reinstall the OS so many times since then that I have lost count. Many of my files were damaged severely. A lot were backed up but there were a significant number that weren't so it has been bloody hell trying to recover these corrupt files - it was a 160GB hard drive so even if only 10% were crap, that still translates to 16GB of files that I have to attempt to repair manually. A lot of these damaged files were my Manic Street Preacher's ftp files so I have about 900 plus mp3s that I have to go thru one at a time to figure out what they are, etc. There are a whole boatload of other files that I have to sort too. I have been procrastinating doing this as well because it isn't the "funnest" job in the world but I don't think that I can procrastinate much longer because I am approaching the two month anniversary of the ftp being down and that isn't fair to those that want to get at these Manic files. I was thinking of creating a folder for the damaged files and seeing if I could get a few members of the ftp to download a bunch of files and check thru them and then re upload them back to the ftp once they were all fixed. Mostly all that they would have to do is rename them and make sure that the correct file extension is included. All these files were rewritten with an MS-DOS file name i.e. MANIC~1, MANICS~2, etc. All the extensions were dropped so I have about 600 mp3s that appear to be titled the same. The only good thing about this is that I am so anal retentive so over 90% of these files had correct mp3 tags so if you have a proper program, you can extract the tags and use the tags to rename the file. Even so, the process is extremely time consuming and tedious. I will think more of a solution later.

I am at work right now so this will be all for now. Went to see a really good band on Saturday night - Alexisonfire. Two of my friends were in one of the bands opening for Alexisonfire which was tres cool. I have some pictures that I will post in the next couple of days too...ok work beckons so must go for now...

Here are some of the new graphics that I have been working on for the ftp:

FTP is back in the game...

Emma Davis

Emma Davis is one of my favourite artists. I have made some icons out of her artwork.